A work of fiction. … mostly.
It’s almost impossible for a northerner to move to the south and make friends without receiving the nickname Yankee. You’d need something like a cleft chin, in which case you’d be called Butt Chin or Old Butt Face, to avoid this. You have two options when nicknamed Yankee: you can [...]
The first thing that hit me when I returned to Shenzhen was the air pollution. For whatever reason, I didn’t think it was that bad last year. Of course there were times when I was like, “Holy shit look at that smog,” but it wasn’t that many. This time around, I think that almost every [...]
The week’s best low moment came around 12:10 p.m. on Thursday, when I was forced to take a shit at the school. This marked the first time I couldn’t hold it until I got home. I detest the school bathrooms. The boys’ rooms smell like a sewer. And, most of all, I hate squatting, and [...]
Good times were had by all in the Philippines. I especially enjoyed spending an afternoon watching cockfights. The arena wasn’t crowded, so I roamed, taking as many pictures as possible. Outside, the losers were grilled, and in between fights, really old Beatles songs were played. My friends and I passed around a bottle of Filipino [...]
MASSAGES: THAI, VIETNAMESE, REFLEXOLOGY, HOT STONE is typed in blood red Franklin Gothic Heavy font on the sign in the alley, and the girls sitting around the door each are wearing the same brown orderly uniform. “You want massage-y” a girl stands up and says. “No thanks. Had one two days ago,” I say without [...]
I brought a Wal-Mart straw fedora with me to China this year, and yeah, I know it’s kinda douchey, but I live in a sub tropical climate, and on hot sunny days, or if I travel to Thailand or Malaysia this winter, I want to be wearing the hat. I’m not sure why. I used [...]
